2003-04-06 - 9:53 p.m.

In My Heart ~ Robyn

Hope things will get better 'cause that's what I need I think about the good times that we had and now I see that you are living in two different places and I don't think it's gonna be a change But I'm never gonna leave it I'm always gonna keep it In my heart In my heart I'll keep it all together In my heart I know it's gonna be better In my heart You said that it should never be like this and when I was a little child I never had this on my mind But now it is like it is and I don't think it's gonna be a change But I'm never gonna leave it I'm always gonna keep it In my heart

~ so much has happened in the past between us and i havent told anyone. this past thursday i hung out with some kid that i see every once in a while and barely know, however, he seems to know a lot about me. he practically recited my sexual history in this town to me. he swears that he's the only one that the ex of mine told, but i doubt that. other people know. not from me. i don't like to be the topic of conversation, so i avoid making it happen by keeping most of what happens to me to myself. maybe later on in life i'll write a book. and then change my name to it. i'll publish it then and people can read about everything then. if they even want to. but anyways. i don't like to be broadcasted, i keep everything in my heart. well...almost everything.

Stuck ~ Stacie Orrico

I can't get out of bed today Or get you off my mind I just can't seem to find a way To leave this love behind I ain't trippin I'm just missing You know what I'm saying You know what I need You can't be hanging on a string While you make me cry I try to give you everything But you just gave me lies I ain't trippin I'm just missing You know what I'm saying You know what I need Every now and then When I'm all alone I'll be wishing you will call me on the telephone Say you want me back But you never do I feel like such a fool There's nothing I can do.. I'm such a fool For you I can't take it What am I waiting for? I'm still breaking I miss you even more And I can't fake it The way I could be for I hate you but I love you I can't stop thinking of you It's true I'm stuck on you Now love's a broken record that's Been skipping in my head I keep singing yesterday Why we've got to play these games we play? I ain't trippin I'm just missing You know what I'm saying You know what I need Every now and then When I'm all alone I'll be wishing you will call me on the telephone Say you want me back But you never do I feel like such a fool I can't take it What am I waiting for? I'm still breaking I miss you even more And I can't fake it The way I could be for I hate you but I love you I can't stop thinking of you It's true I'm stuck on you Every now and then When I'm all alone I'll be wishing you will call me on the telephone Say you want me back But you never do I feel like such a fool There's nothing I can do..I'm such a fool For you I can't take it What am I waiting for? I'm still breaking I miss you even more And I can't fake it The way I could be for I hate you but I love you I can't stop thinking of you I can't stop thinking of you It's true I'm stuck on you

~ and its true because i'm stuck on you. i find myself on saturday nights wondering where you are, and if you're off with the dumb blonde girl you call love. i wonder if i'm going to see you. i put make-up on in case i do. but then i come home late at night and think that putting the make-up on was a waste because i didn't see you. it's funny how i was hurting before, and then i stopped and now its back, after almost a fucking year of nothingness...the hurt is back. i miss you. i had a horrible weekend and i know that if i saw you it prolly wouldda been better, that or i'm just imagining it. i dreamt about him last night, and its another sticky situation. he's constantly on my mind. when you aren't, he is. such a beautiful character that boy, i have yet to find a flaw....

Hospital Song ~ Ben Folds Five

lying awake in my hospital room silas creek parkway is my only view and the doctor just came by and told me the news i need a second opinion i don't believe that it's true

~to my poppy, i keep you constantly in my prayers. you've been through a lot in the past few months and i just want to see you smile again. i want to see you walk again. hopefully it will happen. you created this family. you started it. if not for you, none of us would be here today. i love you. i hope you're home and better soon.

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